Believe in your feelings, so you won't regret it
by Kamiya-Kun
Summary: When Kira was being hospitalized by Lacus, the two eventually developed feelings for each other. But how will Kira express his feelings, when he scares of hurting others and he didn't to develope feelings for his friends fiance. Set in Episode 34
1. Don't be afraid to express your feelings

Disclaimer: I do not have anything related to Mobile Suit Gundam Seed. Just a Fan of it.

Set in Episode 34

"Wouldn't it be nice, if we could remain like this forever?" The pink-haired girl said and smiled. She held the brown haired boy's arm close to her. The sun was about to set, and the pair stood on the balcony, watching the beautiful sun.

"Can I…really stay with you like this? Lacus. I mean er-well about you and Athrun being engaged…" The purple eyed boy said.

"Of course, I don't any problems. You'll be safe here too, Kira." Lacus said and smiled. "Come, it's time for dinner." Lacus smiled and dragged Kira back into the house.

Kira had not yet gotten used to eating with Lacus's father, Siegel Clyne, and Malchio. He felt guilty because he had been fighting Zaft all along but right now he is staying in Plant.

"Take it easy; don't strain yourself like that. You may stay here and relax." Siegel said

"Umm…thank you, for taking me into your custody. I-I don't deserve to be treated this well." Kira said.

"And why is that?" Siegel asked the boy.

"I…had been fighting Zaft all along…and yet…" Kira didn't know how to express his gratitude for Clyne's kindness.

"Don't worry about that. You fought because you wanted to protect your friends right? Lacus told me about it. You didn't fight because you wanted to; we understand that well. Right, Lacus?" Lacus smiled at her father's words. It was true that both of them knew Kira's reason for fighting and they understood his situation well, because they too, had wanted to end the war.

"Lord Siegel Clyne, you have a call from Lord Eileen Canaver." A voice over the intercom said.

"Now, if you'll excuse me. Lacus, please take good care of him." Siegel left the dining hall and went into his office.

Kira continued to eat his dinner along with Lacus and Malchio. After they had finished eating, Kira helped them clean up the place up along with Lacus. Malchio smiled at how the two had gotten close.

Suddenly Lacus kissed Kira on the cheek. Kira jumped up, and asked her what that was about.

"Well, a grain of rice was on your cheek so…" Lacus didn't finish the sentence but she just smiled. Kira's face turned such a deep red that it made Lacus giggle at him.

"Umm…I think I should go get some sleep." Kira said goodnight to Lacus and Malchio and went to sleep in his room.

"He is really a nice boy isn't he? He shouldn't be getting caught up in this war." Malchio said to Lacus.

"Yes…because of war, Kira…had many nightmares." Lacus said.

"I guess it time for me to get some sleep too." Lacus helped Malchio walk back to his room. After Lacus had said goodnight to Malchio she went to see Kira.

Lacus opened the door to see Kira sleeping and smiling. She was happy that at least she could make Kira smile in his sleep. She kissed his cheek before she left.

"_Kira!"_

"_No, Tolle! Stay away." A red shield flew into the skygrasper, killing the pilot in one hit._

"Noooo!." Kira woke up crying. The tears were flowing from his eyes. Kira brushed away the tears.

He looked out at the window and saw that it was dawn already.

Kira walked out of the room, and then out of the house. He walked along the beach to recollect his thoughts.

"What're you doing here so early?" A voice asked him behind.

"I…just had a nightmare so…I walked up to clear my mind." Kira answered "What about you, Lacus?"

"I saw you walk out of the house so I walked after you. I need to take care of you, don't I?" Lacus smiled. But Kira still looked sad; he couldn't put Tolle's death behind him yet.

"Kira" Lacus called out his name and smiled. Then she pushed him into the water.

"La-Lacus! Why did you do that for?" Kira asked.

"Well, I just wanted you to cheer up." Lacus' beautiful smile rendered Kira speechless, he couldn't be angry with her when she was smiling like that.

"I'll pull you up, okay? 1, 2 ,3" Instead of pulling Kira up, Lacus was pulled down.

"Awww, Kira. That's not nice." Lacus said in a sulky tone.

Kira didn't say anything but he charged into Lacus and hugged her. He let himself cry in Lacus's arms. Lacus was there with him, singing to calm, comfort, and make peace to his soul.

When they saw the sun rise, they got out of the water; Kira took off his shirt and put it on Lacus so that she wouldn't get cold. Then they walked back to the house together.

Siegel watched the couple from faraway with Malchio and smiled when he saw how happy Kira had become...

"If the scar in his heart can be healed, it is good enough right? Reverend Malchio." Siegel sat at the table and have a sip of tea.

"Yes, I guess so. Because he holds Seed, I don't want him to be in pain because of his own power." Siegel sighed at Malchio's words..

"I'm sorry that I pulled you into the water." Kira apologized to the pink haired girl.

"No, it's okay. You should go change your clothes." Kira nodded and get back into his room. Lacus went to her room to get changed too. After Lacus changed her dressed, she went to check on Kira. She slowly opened the door to see Kira is changing his shirt. She slowly hugged him from behind.

"Kira…can I ask you something? Lacus slowly said.

"Yes, I'll help you if I can. Just tell me what you want me to do." Kira made his voice sound as gentle as possible as he could.

"Kira…will you stay with me…here? I want you to stay with me…I don't want you to leave." Lacus expressed her feelings for Kira for the times they've spend together.

"But…Lacus…you got Athrun…I can't simply…not again, I don't want to…" Kira didn't want it to happen again, first he made things worse between Fllay and Sai, now it's Lacus and Athrun. Kira kept wondering why he had to go through things like this over and over.

"It's okay…if you don't want to stay with me…" Lacus's voice was down and saddened.

"No…Lacus…It's just….I've already destroyed one of my friend's relationships. But I…don't want to see it happen…again. I can't make your relationship with Athrun worse too…I couldn't live up with it." Kira's body was shaking.

"I'm sorry…Kira, I- I shouldn't have said something like that…Just forget what I said…I'm sorry." Lacus left the room afterwards.

"Wait! Lacus, I…" Kira punched into the wall, He hated himself for always hurting the people close to him, on top of killing so many people as well.

Kira fully dressed himself and ran after Lacus. He caught her hands and said apologized to her for being rude.

"It's nothing…you don't have to worry about it, I'm not angry." Kira knew that Lacus was sad because of him so he wanted to make it up to her.

"Lacus, wait!" Kira didn't just stop her this time, he kissed her. Then Kira expressed his feelings to Lacus.

"I'm sorry…I-I really love you but…I'm afraid that I will hurt you, and I can't forgive myself if that happens." Lacus touch Kira's face with her hand and said "As long as you're with me, I believe that you won't hurt me, Kira. I will stay by your side too." The pair hugged each other as tightly as they could.

Kira held Lacus's hand and they walked to the glass room outside of their house together where Siegel and Malchio were drinking tea.

"I'm sorry, Reverend Malchio. But no flights scheduled for Earth have been allowed to take off." Siegel said.

"Father, is that true?" The pink haired girl asked her father.

"It seems that way Lacus." Siegel sighed.

"Lord Siegel, Lord Eileen Canaver wishes to speak with you. She said that it's an emergency and she needs to discuss it with you right away." A man voice spoke over.

"Put her on."

"Siegel Clyne, we have been deceived by Patrick Zala! The true target of the spilt break operation isn't Panama, but Alaska! The council didn't approve of this!" Eileen Canaver's words shocked Kira.

"Kira!" Kira fell to his knees just as Lacus screamed out his name.

Siegel left the room shortly afterwards to have a proper meeting with the council.

"I…I have go back…Lacus. I'm sorry…" Tears flowed down from Kira's eyes but he didn't cry.

"It's okay; you want to protect everyone right? But where will you go back to?" Lacus said.

"I have to go...back to Earth." Kira stood up and looked into Lacus's eyes.

"But you alone can't stop the war…" Lacus said in her normally calm tone.

"Still, I can no longer remain here and watch but do nothing." Kira continued the sentence that made Lacus made up her mind. "If one did nothing because he believes that he won't make any difference. He would end up doing even less. Then nothing will change, nothing will end."

"Then will you be fighting against Zaft again? Or Earth Force?" Kira shook his head at both of Lacus questions.

"Neither one. I think that if I fight…it will only cause the war to spread. After I stayed with you, you helped me realize and understand what I should really be fighting against." Lacus nodded, she held his arms and she led him to her father office.

"Father…" Siegel nodded okay to Lacus.

"Lacus, take him to that place. I'll prepare for an escape route, we have to stop Chairman Zala or else there will be nothing left to protect." Siegel ordered the butlers to pack things for them.

"Kira, this way." Lacus led Kira to dressing room; there she gives him a red Zaft suit.

"Wear this Kira." Lacus called out to one of the butlers and told him to inform everyone that Lacus Clyne will be singing a song of peace for those who have lost their beloved.

Kira changed his clothes and into the Zaft red suit and Lacus commented on how good he looked wearing it.

Lacus took Kira to the secret factory that was building a secret mobile suit. Every soldier greeted Lacus and smiled, happy to see her. They opened the door to the factory for her.

Lacus showed Kira a new Zaft Mobile Suit.

"Gundam!" Kira said it out in amazements.

"Well, it's actually different. This is ZGMF X10A Freedom, built under the orders from the new Chairman, Patrick Zala. But I like how you called it Gundam. It looks strong" Lacus told Kira to change into his pilot suit.

Kira held the Zaft suit that Lacus had given him firmly. "Can I take this with me? I don't want to lose it…" Lacus smiled and nodded. "Why are you letting me…"

"Because I believe that this mobile suit has the power that you need. It will surely fulfill your needs Kira; it can take you anywhere and help you when you're in need of the power to stop the war. Neither will alone nor strength alone can make difference." Lacus gave her short speech to Kira.

"Neither will nor strength alone…who are you really?" Kira looked into the pinked haired eyes.

"I am Lacus Clyne, Kira Yamato." Lacus smiled.

"Are you going to be all right?"

"I'll be okay, just promise that you will come back to me."

"Be careful okay?" Kira pulled Lacus close and kissed her. Kira blushed before he went into the cockpit of Freedom.

"Cool, this one has higher specs than Strike around 3-4 times." Kira looked at the monitor and saw Lacus waving goodbye to him before the door closed.

Kira started up Freedom and the airlocks was opened by the helped from Lacus's subordinate.

"Kira Yamato, Freedom. Launching!" The base alerted the defense force around that area to catch Freedom but no one was able to catch up with Freedom's speed. Kira flew back down into Earth, into Alaska, to where his friends were fighting.

Please rate and review the story. I felt like I actually cut the story at the ending a little. Sorry. After the Exams have passed, I'll be remaking it.


	2. Belief, Relieved Hearts and Mind

I'm sorry for the late update. This chapter is driving me crazy before I can write it all (First reason is because of my Window 7 isn't compatible with Nvidia GT 220 it's very hard to fix it but right now I don't have any PC issues. So the story should be update a bit quicker)

If the grammar in this chapter is bad. I've to apologize for it. It's been hard for me to write these down without KiraxLacus at all.

Anyway please enjoy it.

* * *

Kira flew down in time to save Archangel of its destruction.

"Murrue-san!" Kira contacted Archangel's bridge with the same code when he was pilot Strike.

"Kira…kun?" Everyone was surprised and glad at the same time they see Kira's face.

"Please, land the Archangel quickly! I'll cover you while you're landing." Kira began disabled Zaft's forces.

"We can't land here! We have to get away from Alaska base as far as possible; The Cyclops system was installed into the underground base ofAlaska. When it activates, everything around the base will be disintegrate to pieces!" Kira gritted his teeth when he heard about the Earth Forces's strategy plan.

Kira warned both Zaft and Earth forces about the Cyclops system that was installed in the underground base of Josh-A then he used Freedom to disable all of the mobile suits on the battlefield.

"Do you think you can lie!" Duel flew toward Freedom and took out its beam saber preparing to cut its down.

Kira gritted his teeth as he saw Duel. He got the flashback from the time when Duel shot down the civilian shuttle that accidentally gets in their way. Kira went a bit of angry and wanted to destroy Duel but he knows now that destroying won't bring anything back but only to cause more hatred, spreading the war.

Kira dodged Duel's attack and disable it with Freedom's beam saber and kick him down to the see. A Dinn helped Duel before it reaches the sea level and retreated.

"Murrue-san, please break through quickly before they can reform their formation!" Murrue thanked Kira and orderArchangelto launch at full speed.

"Cy-Cyclops system has been activated! They're disintegrating everything around Alaska base!" Sai's words made everyone jumped. The rest of Zaft forces began to retreat after they've witnessed the power of the Cyclops system. The result was around half of the Zaft forces were decimated

"Murrue-san, what are you going to do next?" Kira asked while on the Freedom.

"I don't know…I don't know anymore….." Everyone in Archangel looked down and very sad.

"Murrue!" Mu walked into the bridge in his pilot suit. "I suggest that we go to Orb. They have been openly accepted everyone that want peace in theirs life for a long time. I don't think it they will turn our request down." Murrue nodded and then Archangel decided to take path towards Orb.

"I'll cover you until we reach Orb." Kira said and flew in his mobile suits.

"Lacus…what're you doing? I wonder…please be safe…" Kira mumbling in his own mind.

"What did you do that for…explain yourself! Lacus Clyne!" A man pointed the gun in his hand toward the pink haired girl demanding answer from her.

"Because you know what happened, that's why you came here isn't it? Athrun." Lacus replied.

"Then what about you assisted the spy!" Athrun asked.

"I never assisted any spy, surely you knew that I was the one who handed over Freedom because of the surveillance camera right? Don't you see that brown haired boy who wore the Red Zaft Suit?" Lacus began to get in reason with Athrun.

"Well, yes. But how could I know that he was Kira! After all Kira was…"

"Was killed by you?" Lacus finished the sentence for the blue haired boy. Athrun gasped at Lacus's words.

"Don't worry, Kira is still alive." Lacus smiled.

"You're lying!" Athrun's hand began shaking.

"Reverend Malchio brought him to me, Kira also told me that you two have fought against each other. You don't believe in my words? If so, do you believe what did you see with your own eyes? Both in battlefields, and in Plant. " Athrun cannot say anything because Lacus was right about everything.

"What is it that you believe in and fight for it? Is it the medal you will receive? Or because it's your father's order? If this still continues in yourself, then Kira will probably become your enemy again, including me." Lacus walked up to looked eye to eye with Athrun. "If I become your enemy, will you shoot me down? Athrun Zala of Zaft."

"I…I…" A door slammed open get the two attentions.

"Thank you, Athrun Zala. You really saved us some time." A man in black spoke and the other men in black suits begin running into the theater room.

"What is the meaning of this!" Athrun pointed his gun to the man in black suit.

"She's a fugitive accused of treason. Please step away, so we can finish our assignment." One of the men in black was shot in the head and so does the other.

Athrun took Lacus behind the rock pillar, when the last of the men in black about to shoot Lacus. Dacosta shot him in the head.

"Are you satisfied enough? Lacus-sama. We have to get going soon." Dacosta walked along with Zaft green suit armed with gun.

"Yes, thank you. I'm off then Athrun. Take care of yourself." Athrun can only stare at her back when she walked away. "Kira's on Earth. Why don't you go find him and have a conversation with him?" Lacus suggested Athrun before he left.

"Thank you, Lord Uzumi, for accepting our selfish request." Murrue bowed down her head.

"Given the situation, your crewmembers will be under tight watch for the time being. But it should be able to give them some rest." Murrue thanked Uzumi and everyone bowed down theirs head. "Because of the destruction of Earth Forces's headquarter. The world will surely be shifting in a new direction."

"We will give you the latest information we just knew." Kisaka said. "You'll be surprise at the news."

"So you've met Athrun." The brown haired boy said.

"When we went to search for you, we found him instead. He was crying and saying that he killed you." Cagali spoke to Kira.

"I…killed one of his friends, but Athrun also killed Tolle. It can't be helped, I guess…for both of us." Cagali glared in a little of amazement.

"You two are friends since you were little, right?" Kira nodded.

"Athrun always help me in everything, I was so idiot back then." Cagali smiled.

"Hey…can I ask you something?" Kira nodded. "Why did you stay with Earth Forces, if you know that you have to fight him…I mean you're a coordinator after all. So it seems so foolish to stay, knowing that you'll have to fight your friends."

"Because I thought that if I don't do something, everyone will die…but…in truth….the real reason is because I never thought that Athrun and I will fight to kill each other in battle."

Miriallia walked into the cell room carrying a plate of food with her.

"Here's your dinner…" Miriallia said and give the plate to Dearka. "Sorry for the delay, things were going so chaos out there."

Dearka stared at Miriallia in amazement before she realizes it and asked. "What is it?"

"Well, I never thought that you'll be the one who bring it." Dearka explained to the brown haired girl.

"My name's Miriallia, not "You" understand?" Miriallia said.

"Eh? You mean it's okay to call you by name?" Dearka smiled a little.

"No!" Miriallia replied before she began to walk away.

"Wait, where is this, and what're you going to do with me?" Dearka asked.

"I don't know either, and this is Orb." Miriallia left afterwards.

* * *

"Cyclops system? Even if the information had been leaked, they couldn't have time to prepare something like that. Also going through with such a plan is rather extreme." Uzumi said.

"But it is undeniable that it took out almost 80% of Zaft advances forces, with the added of unwanted forces." Kisaka said.

Uzumi opened the television to see the Earth Alliance is broadcasting about the latest news, and cheers every natural to completely obliterate the coordinators for their blue pure world.

Uzumi closed the television and said that the Atlantic Federation is pressuring every nation in the world to join force with them or those who don't agree with them will be declared as enemy, and Orb is no exception.

"Because they want Orb's military power!" Cagali's voice showed her anger.

"I'm sure that you're aware that our nation doesn't refuse entry to both coordinator and natural as long as they respect the laws of our nation. We should not be judged by the genes whether they're modified or not. The only result by doing so is only causing more friction between people. Whether Kira-kun is coordinator or Cagali is Natural, these are the fact that they, themselves have no control over." Cagali glared at Kira's and blush resulting in Kira smiled back.

"You're right, sir." Kira replied about Uzumi's words earlier.

"Excuse me for saying this, but isn't your ideal is only in theory? Coordinators will still be looking down on naturals, and naturals will always be jealous of coordinators." Mu said.

"I realized that. That's why you're young people have the will to change the world isn't it?" Kira agreed with Uzumi's words and smiled.

"You intend to fight, even though you're alone?" Mu asked.

"I'll just do my best, that's all I'm hope for." Kira replied. "I don't like things right now, and I don't think things will be able to solve like this."

"Kira, Erica wants to see you; she said that she's something to show you." Cagali said.

"I thought I should return this to you, as you have returned." Erica said while led Mu, Murrue, Kira and Cagali into Morgenroete facility.

"The Strike?" Kira spoke.

"Yes, after finished repairing it, I installed the OS you created for us. I figured that this time someone will be piloting it." Erica explained.

"The one designed for Naturals?" Erica nodded at Mu's question.

"I'll be piloting it, surely if you allow me to." Cagali said.

"No, I'll be the one who pilot it." Everyone surprised at Mu's wish.

Mu asked Kira to sparring with him and of course, Kira won't refuse the request.

"Don't you think it's too fast for you to be sparring with me?" Kira asked.

"If you don't do it seriously, I won't forgive you! Here I come!" Strike charged into Freedom with its beam saber.

The next day Orb received a Final warning from Earth Alliances to cooperate with them. As a nation on Earth, on behalf of all participating nation. The Earth Alliances demands the following from Orb Union. First, the immediate resignation of Orb ruling Government. Secondly, the disarmament and dissolution of the Neutral Army. If these conditions haven't been met in 48 hours, Orb will be considered as supporter of Zaft and will be confronted with force.

After the meeting, The Orb's council decided to evacuate the people first.

Murrue called everyone on theArchangelto gather at the factory. Murrue explained the situation to everyone that aboard theArchangeland if someone is willing to leave then, she won't force them to stay because she doesn't have authority above them now. Everyone decided to stay. Except Kazzuey, he decided to leave.

Miriallia unlocked the door to Dearka's cell and gave him his Zaft Pilot Suit back.

"What is the meaning of this? I'm free to go?" Dearka asked.

"Yes, because this ship is going out to battle again. And we don't have any need to hold you anymore since we're not aligned with the Earth Alliance anymore." Miriallia explained.

"What's that supposed to mean that you're not with Earth Alliance anymore?" Dearka ran after Miriallia into the hallway.

"It's just as I said, Earth Alliances are attacking Orbs so theArchangelmust fight. So there's no reason to keep you right?" Dearka still unsatisfied with the answer.

"What I want to know is why you're not with the Earth Alliance and why fighting them?"

"Because Orb refused to side with the Earth Forces, that's why and that's all."

"That's hardly make sense, are you guys idiot?" Miriallia stopped walking and looked back at him.

"Say what you like but once the battle begin, things will get chaotic so get off why do you still have the chance…I'm sorry it turned out this way. " Miriallia said.

"Hey, what about Buster!"

"That was ours to begin with, so Morgenroete took it. Sorry…."

"Are you going to fight too?" Dearka grabbed the girl's arm before she walks away.

"Of course, since Orb is my home country! And I'm in charge of CIC inArchangel." Miriallia walked away leaving the boy alone.

Orb deployed all of its force to defend the nation from the Earth Alliance when the fight begin, the Earth Alliance revealed theirs new Mobile Suits that has power surpassed normal Mobile suits many times. They're "Raider" "Forbidden" and "Calamity" these three were build to support each other and they've no flaws except the pilot that was living CPU.

They began rampaged on M1 Astray with the speed; Astray was being destroyed one by one.

Kira tried to intercept them but with three on one, it was too hard for him to lure them all at once.

The Earth Forces, Strike Dagger and Orb, M1 Astray have the equally both in power and speed. But the Earth Forces are using the number to win against Orb's army.

The fighting continued for around half day and the Earth Forces fell back giving Orb army to rest.

After Uzumi patrolled the casualties, he realized that if they still continued the fighting. Nothing will changed, only the casualties that will increase. He orders to prepare Kusanagi for launch to space as quickly as possible. Because if they continued to fight nothing will change, except the complete destruction of Orb.

Athrun flew in his Justice to Orb, after Cruset reported to his father that Freedom was seen in Orb.

"This is Athrun Zala, I want to contact with Cagali Yula Attha, may I pass? I come in peace and not relate in any negotiation with Zaft" Cagali told to let him through as she believes that he really come in peace. And she also hopes that Athrun and Kira will reconcile with each other.

"Athrun, come here quick!" Cagali dragged Athrun after he finally reaches the ground.

"Cagali, what are you doing! As the daughter of the nation representative you shouldn't…." "There's no one else to care, every civilians have evacuated" Cagali cut Athrun off but that made Athrun understands the situation better that Orb really fight to the last of theirs forces.

"Cagali, who did you…..Athrun…." Kira said and slowly walks up to the pair.

"Kira…" Athrun said. "So you're really the pilot of Freedom, huh?"

"Yes…..what about you, why did you come here…Athrun. Is it to bring Freedom back to Zaft, right?" The boys' voice still calm.

"You're right. But right now I don't have intentions to fight you. I just wanted to talk with you, Kira." Athrun and Kira walked up to each other. "I've thought that I killed you…I'm happy…that you're alive…" Athrun hugged Kira.

"Athrun!" The boys cried as they have found each other again. Cagali smiled as she watches the boy reconcile with each others.

Everyone gathered around and watch the boys talk with each other, after they have calmed down.

"But that's impossible for Orb to…" Athrun said.

"Yes, everyone is well aware of the difficulty. But I believe that it can't be avoided. I believe what Cagali's father said is true. Should Orb side with Earth Federation; they would surely take advantage of that and attack Plant." Cagali brought the boys water to drink and stand there, listening to them.

"And it's the same thing if Orb side with Zaft, it only thing that differs is enemy. I can no longer live like that anymore, that's why I decided to…" Kira smiled.

"But you still…" Athrun didn't finish his words. Dearka walked behind Miriallia and listen to the boys too.

"I killed one of your comrades, but I don't even know him. And it's not like I wanted to kill him. You killed Tolle, but you didn't know him too, and it's not like you wanted to kill him, wasn't it?" Kira asked.

"No…I tried to kill you back there, Kira." Athrun gritted his teeth as he says out those words.

"It's the same with me…It would be great if we can live in a world without war. If only we can live forever in such a world like that. But it is impossible…I know that. At this rate, either Zaft or Earth, one of them will be completely obliterated. " Kira said.

"Therefore, I decided to fight even if it's only me alone. I just wanted to protect my friends, but I know that after I've pulled the trigger there's no turning back anymore. Are we destined to fight each other again? Athrun." Kira smiled but with a sad face.

"I've met Lacus after you went back to Earth. She made me realize what should I believe in…" Athrun eyes' looked sadden and filled with pain.

"I've to go back to duty right now, because we don't know when they're going to attack again. It's good to have a talk with you again, Athrun."

"Kira, wait! You know right? That Freedom was equipped with Neutron Jammer Cancellor. If someone were to…"

"If anyone decides to use it for theirs own purpose. I'll shoot them down with my own hands." Kira went up to check on Freedom leaving Cagali and Athrun.

Miriallia cried and ran after the boys finished theirs conversation. Dearka ran after her, hoping to help her.

Athrun sat back and thinks something alone until Cagali speaks up.

"Kira's changed, right?" Cagali asked the blue haired boy.

"No…he's the same as always…" Athrun smiled.

"What do you plan to do now?" Cagali asked.

"I don't know…but maybe I already have the answer. It's just tough to decide something, that's all for now, I guess." Athrun went back on his Justice.

Uzumi watches as the Kusanagi being prepared to launch into the space. Kira slept on Freedom as everyone is resting too. Athrun was thinking alone as Dearka watches him from far away. Mu and Murrue were talking together as if they enjoy to be together.


	3. Prelude to Sadness

Actually, I just finish my first day of Final. So if the story has grammar mistakes and seems weird. I'm sorry.

Anyway, please enjoy.

* * *

"You want us to launch into space? But we still can fight." Murrue said.

"I'm pretty sure that you realize by now that it's only a matter of time before Orb will be completely destroyed." Uzumi said. "Everyone has evacuated, we'll take over from here. Still I want you to remember two things that mustn't be lose. The master mind behind the Earth Forces is the leader of Blue cosmos, Muruta Azrael. In addition, the Plants are now controlled by Patrick Zala."

Dearka and Kira glanced at Athrun.

"At this rate the world will be caught between the fight of these two forces, is that the future that you accept? If you see envision an alternative. Then take this light of hope that everyone has lit and guide us to a new future." Uzumi said.

"We understand, Lord Uzumi. We believe that this small light of hope will never fade away." Murrue said. Uzumi told them to get ready before the Earth Forces attack again.

Uzumi put his hand on Cagali's head and looks toward Kira, his eyes looks like it were filled with sadness yet it was gentle, kind and worry.

Kusanagi began assembling every part that was separated when it went into the factory, then the M1s begin loading into Kusanagi.

Then one of the Orb's council began informing how to launch Archangel into the space.

When they heard a warning sound that Earth Forces has send out its mobile suit, Uzumi told Murrue to hurry up. Kira and Athrun volunteered to help give them more time for the Kusanagi while the Archangel will launch out ahead.

Cagali tried to get Uzumi to go with her but Uzumi insists that he will stay here and dragged Cagali to the Kusanagi. Uzumi gave a picture to Cagali and said. "Even if you're parting with your father, but you're not alone…you still have a brother."

Cagali flipped the picture to see names in handwriting "_Kira & Cagali_"

Uzumi nodded and told Kisaka to take his daughter away and protect her. Kisaka nodded, then the Kusanagi door closed and Uzumi went back to the control room.

After the Archangel successfully launched out into space, Kira and Athrun stalled the three mobile suits long enough for Kusanagi to launch.

They flied to the Kusanagi and tried to get on it. When the Freedom was able to grab on one of Kusanagi part, it stretch out its hand and help the Justice to grab on Kusanagi too.

Soon Kusanagi launches away from Orb and Orb becomes smaller every second Cagali sees. When the explosion was saw and Orb was engulfed in flame, Cagali broke down and cried as she sees Orb perishes along with her father. After Kusanagi has successfully launched into the space. It began assembling into Izumo spaceship class.

Its design was nearly the same as Archangel, in truth, to be more precise. It was Archangel that used The Kusanagi's blueprint in the first place.

Everyone go gathers at the Kusanagi's bridge.

"What should we do next?" Murrue asked Kisaka over the monitor. Kisaka told Erica to open the space map, and the two warships share it together.

They've search for a place they can used as a base but they've no luck so far. When all hopes are look like to be lose, Athrun said out "At the L4 colony, there are still many facilities that are still able to operate. Although it isn't officially, Zaft has sent a scout unit to it and has seen no life sign on the colony so far. I think it should be okay to set up a base there."

Although everyone seems fine with Athrun's advice but Mu isn't.

"Are you really sure, you're okay with this? Even though your actions speak for you. But I can't look over about your uniform. Besides...you're Patrick Zala's son right?" Athrun clasped his hand; he knew it well about what Mu just said.

"It doesn't matter if you're someone son! As only as you-"

"Betraying one's country is a terrible crime! Not to say that your father is the leader of the nation." Mu cut Cagali off and she gritted her teeth. Even if she wanted to protect Athrun, she can't do it because she understands what Mu has said.

"I will get straight to the point. Will we be able to rely on you as a strong ally? So answer me." Mu said.

"After what I have seen up until this point…I don't know now what is right or wrong, but I believe that the world I hope for is the same one that you hope for. This is what I feel right now." Athrun said.

"The responsibility that Orb has entrusted to use isn't that lightly, still with only two ships, it's really difficult isn't it?" Murrue smiled and nodded.

"There is another person in Plant who has the same belief as you." Athrun looked sad after he said that sentence.

"Lacus? Athrun! Is she…safe? You said that you met Lacus right?" Kira looks very worry about Lacus that much that made everyone surprises. "Athrun…?"

"She is being…chased and hunts down as traitor…by my father's order." Kira looked sad after he heard the word.

"Umm…Kira…can I have a word with you?" Kira nodded in agreement. "…Athrun…would you mind coming with us?" Athrun shook his head then the three left the bridge. Kisaka looked at Cagali and knew what she wants to say with the boy but he didn't stop her.

Cagali took them to her room, after she gathers her courage. Cagali held out the picture that Uzumi gave her.

"A twin baby? Who are they?" Kira takes the picture from her hand to see it closer.

"The other side…" After the boys flipped the picture, Athrun was surprised and Kira was shocked.

"My Father gave this to me and said that I wouldn't be alone…I still have a brother...if I and you are siblings then what…does…that make me?" Cagali's hand held Athrun's arm tightly as she was about to cry.

"Thinking about it right now won't solve anything, besides even if this is true but your father is still Lord Uzumi." Kira smiled trying to cheer the girl up.

"Kira…" a bit of tear flew out from Cagali's eyes.

"Athrun…let's go back to the Archangel…Kusanagi is getting its storage full just by M1. Cagali stays strong okay?" Cagali nodded and the boys leave the Kusanagi in theirs mobile suits.

"Kira…do you think every will mind? If I…go back to plant…I want to talk with my father. I can't let this keep on forever, it's been troubling my mind since the last time I met Lacus." Athrun said.

Kira looked towards the Freedom's side monitor. "Athrun…" Kira thought. "Okay…then, I'll talk with everyone for you…but on one condition. I'll come with you." Kira said.

"No, you can't! Besides you're in EA uniform, if you come with me, you'll surely get kill!" Athrun shouted.

"Don't worry; I have Zaft Uniform that I got from Lacus. So I guess there's no problem left right? I'll pilot the Freedom too." Each time Kira said made Athrun want to refuse his request even more, first he's going in Zaft Uniform and now he'll pilot the Freedom to Jachin Due.

"No, you mustn't! There's no guarantee that we-I will be able to get from that place. If you are to bring the Freedom to Jachin Due then surely my father won't let these two mobile suits slipped out of his hands again!"

Athrun tried to reason with Kira but Kira didn't listen. Kira still insists that he will go with Athrun into Jachin Due.

"Why did you want to go to Jachin anyway!? Tell me the reason that I should bring you along!" Athrun shouted.

"It's nothing that concerns you" Kira's face become serious and looks very scary like if he didn't achieve his objective, he will die trying to complete it. "If you want to know…then bring me along…I'll…tell you on the way." Was the last sentence that Athrun heard before Kira left the Freedom into the locker room.

Athrun went after Kira into the locker room. "Hey, Kira, please reconsider going to the Jachin Due. You won't make it out of there alive." Athrun warned his best friend.

"Even so…I have to go to Jachin Due even if it cost me my own life." Athrun saw a glimpse of tears flow out from Kira.

"Hey, Kira…you…"

"It's nothing, let's go" Kira went out of the room before he even finish saying.

"Then, we will be right back. Miss Murrue." Said Kira in the Freedom.

"Okay, be careful okay? We don't want to lose you again, neither of you." The boys nodded before they left to Jachin Due in theirs mobile suits.

"Kira, care to tell me now why did you need to come to Jachin Due that much?" Kira was silenced at first before he begins to speak.

"Before…before we left Orb…I got a message that was sent to the Freedom directly…it said that if you concern for Lacus Clyne…then come to Jachin Due…alone…"

"Why didn't you tell me this earlier! And why you didn't tell the other, they might be able to help. And do you really believe that Lacus will be capture? If she really did, my father would make a statement that Lacus have been captured right away." The Justice stopped the Freedom from advancing any further.

"Don't stop me Athrun, or I will force my way through!" The Freedom prepared its beam sabers.

"Hey, take it easy Kira! I won't stop you now that we come this far…" The Freedom lowered its hand from the beam sabers.

"Jachin Due, This is Athrun Zala, Justice. I've completed my mission and requesting permission to land." The boys looked at each other and nodded

"Okay, you're clear to go in. Please go through the hangar E and leave your mobile suits there." The operator said.

After the boys left theirs suit, they changed into uniform and they were ordered to see Patrick immediately.

"May I ask who is that pilot? Athrun Zala." One of the elite soldiers asked.

"He is acquaintance of mine, don't worry." Then the soldiers let them pass and go into the Chairman's room.

"Athrun, good job for bringing the Freedom back." Patrick told the guards and everyone to go out but when Kira was about to leave the room Patrick stops him and tell him to stay in the room.

"Athrun, who is this boy? I don't remember his face." Patrick demanded the identification of the boy besides Athrun.

"This is Kira, Kira Yamato. He was the friend when I was studying on the moon remember, father? The one that you like to ask how is he doing, skilled, or even if he was greater than others coordinator. This is him. Kira, this is my father." Kira saluted to Athrun's Father.

Patrick grinned but when he is about to say, Athrun took the first hand and ask first.

"Father…do you really think that you can use force end this war?"

"Of course, when all of the naturals have been exterminated. Everything will end." The boys clenched their hands after they heard what happened.

"Will you help me exterminate the Natural? Kira." Patrick stood from his chair and walked up to Kira, grabbing his shoulder.

"Why are you asking me personally?" Kira said.

"Because…you're special…you're the most superior coordinator by far." Patrick grinned.

"What did you mean!? I'm just a normal coor-"

"I asked you whether you will help me or not!? Stop asking and answer me!" Patrick's began to grasp Kira tighter when the boy didn't answer his question.

"I will not help you…I will not pilot the Freedom to kill people."

"I see…I wish it didn't come to this. Bring her in." Patrick said and a few seconds later, a pink haired girl was brought in along with a several group of soldiers.

"Father, what are you doing!?" Athrun shouted.

"Now choose, boy! Whether you will help me or you will let this girl die?" One of the soldiers pointed his gun towards Lacus.

"Kira, don't. Don't worry about me but you can't use the Freedom to be a killing machine!" Lacus shouted.

Kira gritted his teeth as he is thinking over in his head.

"Will you promise that she will be safe? If I…help you."

"Kira, no!" Lacus protested as her lover said out the deal.

"Of course, I will ensure her safety…as long as you follow my order, that is." Athrun slowly walked up to the guard and then Athrun kicked them out.

"Athrun, what are you doing!?" After Patrick said, Kira went to help Lacus. Patrick ordered the guards to kill Lacus. Athrun took the gun from one of the unconscious guard and use it to take out guard's gun. But he misses one of them.

That guard fired his gun towards Lacus.

Lacus screamed when she saw Kira took the bullet for her; Lacus called out to Kira and hugs him. She saw her hands filled with Kira's blood. "Kira!" Lacus called out.

"Lacus…you didn't get hurt…right?" Kira coughed in blood.

"No…I'm all right…please don't leave me…" Tears from Lacus's eyes fell on Kira's cheeks.

"Don't worry…I'll…stay by your side…" Kira's eye glittered.

"Don't kill them, I need these two later. Treat him, don't let him die." Kira and Lacus were taken away separately.

"Father, why did you-"

"I suppose I can't blame you because you don't know the whole story. Patrick opened the video that got from the surveillance camera when Freedom is about to be steal. It shown Kira and Lacus face clearly and makes Athrun surprised. His father knew it all along and yet he didn't tell him.

Athrun cursed himself, because of him. Kira was to be used as a killer. If he didn't tell his father that Kira was his friend on the moon, whom his father like to ask about. This wouldn't happen, but when Athrun think again. Its maybe better that the result came out this way or else Kira would've get killed because of stealing Freedom.

"Athrun, this is your new order. Keep on eyes on that friend of yours and don't ever leave him out of sight. Tell him that if he didn't do as he was ordered. Lacus Clyne will die." Athrun gritted his teeth but he knows that if he protests right now, the chance to help both Kira and Lacus will be lessen. Athrun accepted the missions and left the room.

Kira was speechless when he was taken away, all he could feel right now is the pain of the bullet that was dig into his back. He didn't even have the strength to cry. When he feels that everything around him was going hazy. Then he saw a white door opened and he was lain down on a white bed. Then he faint.

Kira's POV

I opened my eyes; I see researchers, doctors and nurses around myself. I feel much better when I don't feel the bullets inside my back anymore, but I don't like the situation right now. It's like they're researching, gathering data from me. Why would they do that? I'm just a normal coordinator after all.

When everyone left the room, they turned off the lights, leaving me alone in the dark. I can't stop myself to worry about Lacus and everyone. Every second that I'm staying right here, they can be attacked anytime. I hope that at least Athrun made his way back to them.

"What should I do?" I asked myself. The choice I have right now is to cooperate with Athrun's father as much as possible, if I want to save Lacus.

"Move on to the last stage" I heard someone said that but not so long after I heard that voice. I feel like they've injected something into me…something that made…me feel…so sleepy.

When I opened my eyes again, I feel like something was attached to my neck. When I touch it, it zaps my finger.

"You'll have to work for me, if you don't want to get hurt." A cold voice whispers into my ear.

"What about Lacus…?" I asked because I know that the one who whisper to me was Athrun's father.

"She is safe, I keep my promise. She is staying in the Eternal, a new spaceship that you will be assigned to. But if you were to do something funny, you know what would happen."

I saw a soldier ran up to him and tell him something. Something that made him angry, he clenched his hand and suddenly he leaves me alone. I wonder what was that about.

I gather my strength and try to get up from the bed. I wonder how many days have passed since I was brought here. I see bandages on both of my arms…I wonder what've they done to me.

When I try to stand up, I can barely stand on my feet. It seems they drugged me somehow. I walked out of the room; I won't stay in this room forever. But ironic isn't it? When I was able to get out of the room, here comes my first mission.

Athrun's father wants me to go recapture Eternal…and Justice, if they aren't possible to recapture then destroy it.

I began to wonder in my heart, he said Lacus was on the Eternal and now the Eternal has left from Plant. Then I should take this chance to escape since he can't threaten me anymore.

After I changed into pilot suit, deep down inside me, I'm really happy that I'm going to meet Lacus again. I launch Freedom into the space. Then fly towards the Eternal's direction, towards Mendel Colony.

I saw Justice, fending off Zaft Mobile Suits. Even how much I want to help him, I cannot. I don't have solid proof that Lacus was on the Eternal. I fired Freedom's armaments toward Justice and Athrun blocks it with ease.

"Kira! Stop this. You don't have to fight anymore, Lacus is safe." Athrun's words made me feel relieved. I locked on every Ginns on the battlefield and took it down, disabling it.

"Lacus!" I called out to her when I connect to the Eternal. The monitor shows her face that made me feel very happy.

"So you're safe? Youngsters." That voice made me surprise. It was Mr. Waldfeld. He really survived back then.

When I thought this is a very wonderful reunion, I felt something begins to zap around at my neck. It was that collar…

End of Kira's POV.

"Kira!" Both Lacus and Athrun called out to him. Kira is screaming in pain as the collar that wrapped around his neck is continuing to zap him.

Suddenly, the Freedom rapidly fired it beam rifle to Eternal. Luckily Athrun was able to deflect all of them.

"Kira! What the hell are you doing!?" Athrun shouted and used his shield to tackle into Freedom. But there is no response from Kira. The Freedom continued to fight against Justice outside the Mendel colony.

Suddenly, The Freedom began to stop shooting. "Athrun…Lacus…please destroy the Freedom…before…I…will…" Tears were flowing from Kira's eyes as the Freedom began firing its beam rifle again.

"Kira!?" Lacus's face shown that she was very worry about what happened to Kira, she called out his name but he response by firing Freedom rail gun and plasma beam.

It hit the Eternal this time. Justice fired its beam rifle, destroying the Freedom's right arm. Justice releases it backpack, crashing into the Freedom torso. After knocking the Freedom off course, Justice uses its beam boomerangs to cut the Freedom's left arm and legs.

"Kira!" Athrun shouted and flies his Justice towards Freedom and catches it. The Freedom's movement has completely stopped because Kira's lost his consciousness.

Justice took the Freedom back into the Eternal, after it safely reach inside Eternal. Eternal landed besides the Archangel and Kusanagi in Colony Mendel.

Athrun took Kira out and let him rest in the pilot room for a while, and then Lacus comes in.

After Athrun saw Kira's sweating, he took off Kira's pilot suit.

"Kira!" Athrun shook the boy.

"What is that thing…?" Lacus said out.

"What is it Lacus?" Athrun asked.

"What's on Kira's neck?" Athrun tried to check up about the electronic equipment on Kira's neck but when he touches it, it sparks up and Athrun quickly back away his hands.

"I think…we should avoid touching that thing." Lacus nodded. "Lacus…take him to rest. I'll go tell everyone and ask them whether they know about this device or not." Athrun left the room afterward leaving the couple alone.

"Kira…what happened to you…" Lacus hugged Kira and cries. Lacus blamed herself, because if she wasn't too careless, if she didn't get captured. Then all of this wouldn't happen.

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So please rate and review what do you think of this chapter.


	4. Lost to Darkness and into Despair

Okay, first of all. I apologized...I broke a promise to keep it update regularly. And this is some kind of short.

I wrote and finish this chapter maybe like 5 months ago and I didn't do anything else. I didn't fix any grammar too and I also wanted to tell you that from next chapter on.

It will be different how I write to tell the story and everything else.

That would be all, please enjoy this chapter.

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Kira's POV.

When I opened his eyes, I see a white cellar. I get up and look around, where am I? The last thing I remembered, was piloting the Freedom and Lacus was safe in Eternal. What happened afterward? Why…I can't remember….it. Argh! My head hurts.

"Kira!" I look in the direction where the sound originated. Lacus rushed her way and hugged me. Her eyes were red, I saw it. And the way she holds me so tightly…something must have happened.

"Lacus, what happened to me?" I asked.

"You fainted" But it wasn't Lacus who answered, it was Athrun. Although I didn't satisfy that Athrun was the one who answer but I know that they're hiding something from me. I clenched my hand and gritted my teeth, so hard and I didn't realize it until Lacus shouted out "Kira! Stop, your hands are bleeding!" I stopped clenched my hand after I heard. I look at my hands.

My hands were bleeding? Did I clench my hands that hard? Athrun ran out of the room to get the bandage.

"Lacus, now, tells me what really happened back there." I put on a cold voice without noticing it and I slapped her.

"Kira…"

"Answer me!" What…what did I just say…how could I…raise my voice against Lacus. How could I hit her…I'm…I'm…What is happening to me.

"Lacus….I'm…I'm sorry." I ran out of the room without of thinking anything else, nor do I care about the blood that flown down from my hands.

"Ouch, ah-ah…I'm sorry Mr. Waldfeld" I apologized for crashing into him.

"It's okay, youngster. It's good that you're awake, hey! Wait where're you going!" I didn't care about his words. I began to cry alone. If something like this keep up…I would end up hurting everyone that I hold dear.

I ran in the corridor without looking in the front, the ship was very complex. I don't know where I have run to…in other words…I'm lost…still, wasn't it better? If I disappeared, so no one will be hurt…by me and I won't hurt anyone anymore.

I finally sat down in the dark corner, watching the star in the space. I let tears fell down from my eyes, and the bleeding on my hands begins to stop. I wish I could be like a star in the sky or a bird that flies in the sky, living a peaceful, normal life.

But…what can I do? I can't blame anyone…or should I blame Destiny? Or Fate? That made me this way. Right now, everyone will surely be searching for me. It would be for the best if they didn't find me.

Maybe I should've died. I couldn't live up with what did I do to Lacus. She cared for me, every second…and looked what at I have become. I…I've made my decision. I'll stay away from everyone…I'll…stop this conflict…alone with Freedom…this way…everyone will be safe.

I began to walk back the way I came, the security will be everywhere, since they would be searching for me.

"There he is!" I heard a voice coming from behind me; I turned to see two guards calling the others. I felt something break down inside me, and then I begin to disable the guards.

End of Kira's POV.

"What happened to them! Are they…still breathing?" A pink haired girl said.

"Yeah, they're still breathing. But it will be a couple of days before they get theirs consciousness back." Athrun said.

"Looks like they were…knockout with a strong force to theirs neck. They're really lucky to survive." Waldfeld said.

"Kira knocked them out…we have to find him, quick!" Everyone nodded in agreement, they searched around and they found many guards fell unconscious along the hallway.

But they have to shock when they began to see blood spilled on the floor.

"We have to hurry!" They followed the trail and soon it reached the hangar.

"Kira! Stop!" Waldfeld shouted.

"I'm sorry…Waldfeld-san…but I can't stop…not anymore…Farewell…Lacus…I was a very lucky person to have someone like you care for me…but I don't want to hurt you…again…it tore me apart…what did I just do to you just now…I can't forgive myself…goodbye."

"Kira! Please…don't leave me…" Lacus's tears filled in her eyes and dipped down on her cheek.

"I can't Lacus…I…can't be at your side…not until I know what's wrong with me…sorry…please give my regards to everyone…"

Kira hacked the computer and open the air hangar on his own, and preventing anyone to shut it down.

"Damn, I'll go after him with Justice." Athrun ran up to his Justice but Lacus stopped him.

"Athrun…no…even if you go after him, I doubt that this incident would happen again. So…I think that it would be the best if we left him alone…just for now"

Even in a situation like this, Lacus hasn't lose her calmness.

"Are you sure, Lacus? I could still catch up to him…" Athrun said to Lacus.

But Lacus stood firm on her decision to not go after Kira, going after him like now would not make anything better.

"Okay…if you say so…"

The group came back to the bridge and explained to everyone…what just happened.

Kira flied away in his mobile suit and cried…he didn't even bother to wear his helmet when he came out in the patient shirt

But he just flied away…and don't even know where to go, the Earth Forces won't accept me but so is Zaft, that's what Kira guess.

"Kira Yamato…" A voice called out to him.

"What…who…" Kira shed away his tears.

"You're confused right? You want to know why this is happening to you…you want to know why you were being keep an eye on." The voice said and then the voice continued. "Come…to this place…and everything will be revealed to you."

A pin point location has appeared on Freedom's monitor. Kira was hesitated at first but he decided to go the location, after all…he doesn't have anything to lose.

Freedom flew with it wings and thrusters all the way to the location, which revealed to be a deserted colony.

Kira checked the condition of the colony which was safe to breath with out a helmet.

He dropped himself down from the Freedom's cockpit, and walked into the lone building.

"Follow the light, it will take you to where you should be." The voice instructed the brown haired boy.

Kira followed the light which leads him into a room-like a laboratory.

"Welcome…to your birthplace, Kira-kun." The voice revealed himself to be no one other than Rau le Cruset.

"You…why did you…" Kira backed himself away from the masked man. He didn't bring any weapons with him.

"Don't worry…I won't hurt you, have I ever hurt you Kira-kun?" Kira couldn't deny what Cruset said, even if Kira doesn't know the man but he isn't seem to be that unreasonable sort of a guy.

"Come over here." Cruset leaded Kira into another room that connected from the lab.

Cruset began his scheme, starting by opening an old record.

It was the record of how Coordinator began to step into this world, with the researchers try their best to modify, develop the newborn child to be.

Then there's another record.

"Give him back…give me back my other child…" The woman cried as she beg the man.

"No, he is mine! I'll make him the ultimate coordinator! The man pushed the woman away.

"Do you think that will make him happy!" The woman said.

"Of course, Via! Being on the top of everybody is the happiest thing anyone could acquire!" The man said.

"That's you, Ulen. Not Kira!" The woman said.

Cruset cut the record off and says "You know right? That's your parent right now is not real, they've always avoided to answer why they made you coordinator right?"

"So what…I don't believe what you just told me or I just saw. There isn't a proof…that…"

"You ask for proof? This is the proof…" Cruset picked something from the desk nearby and show it to Kira.

It was a picture, the same picture that's Cagali shown it to him.

Kira fell down to his knee.

"Now do you know why everyone is after you? You were the only one who survived the procedure…Blue Cosmos was aware of you at that time but they couldn't acquire you in time."

"Then…I…I wasn't born…"

"Now do you see what human true nature is? They don't care what method they have to use all they only want is for them to be at the highest point, better than anyone else, trying to prove themselves without thinking about the consequences of their action."

"I'm just a tool…for them? No, that's…"

"Ulen Hibiki, your father doesn't even care what you would feel, he even make you become a monster. Everyone wants you, because they saw you as a weapon."

"That's…" Deep down inside Kira knew that his heart didn't deny what the man just said.

Tears dropped down from the boy eyes.

"Come with me, Kira-kun. I'll destroy all of the humanity."

Kira began to think what he have been through, what've he been suffering so far and that's what made him fall into darkness, his own darkness. Kira think that if he wasn't born this way, or if humanity never played with the genes in the first place. None of this would have happened to him.

That's when Kira decided that he will join Cruset's quest in clearing humanity, let alone fill this damned world


	5. The plan is revealed and set in motion

Who would have thought that just by watching the remastered seed can give me such inspiration!

Hope you enjoy this chapter, everyone!

* * *

"Lacus…I…I need to talk to you…really…and I want to apologize to you too...can you come to Colony Mendel? You can bring Mu-san along if you feel unsafe…so if you can meet me can you reply to me? And please keep this a secret."

It was a message from Kira to Lacus. Encrypted with a high level security code, but Kira modified Lacus's haro to have the code to open it. So when he wanted to send her a message in secret, she could be the only one to view it.

It's been half an hour already since Lacus got that message and she was still thinking about it, alone.

"Father…what should I do…" Lacus could only glare at the message. "If I go…will I be able to bring Kira back?" Lacus reminiscence back about Kira's eyes when he slapped her, it was so scary. She had never seen that side of Kira before, Kira always had kind eyes. "But…if I stay here…will I be able to solve anything?"

Lacus kept asking herself this question for a several minutes later until she decided she's going to face him. She replied the message back to Kira. Before she opened the intercom in her room and connected it to Arch Angel's bridge.

"Captain Ramius…can I talk with you in private? If possible please bring Flaga-san with you…" Murrue nodded before she left the bridge to get Mu and headed to her the captain's quarter.

"So…what is it you want to talk? Lacus-san." Murrue connected the intercom over from her quarter in Archangel to Lacus's room in Eternal.

"Well…you see…Kira sent a message to me. He said that he wanted to talk with me." Lacus said with her sad and worry face.

"And so…you want to meet him?" Lacus nodded at the Archangel's captain question. "But…it's dangerous for you to go alone. I mean Kira-kun is not himself lately and maybe it's a trap that Cruset set up."

"Well, about that…he said that if I'm scare to go alone then I should bring Flaga-san along."

"That's definitely Cruset idea…we should be extra careful." Mu said. "Maybe we should bring someone else along…just in case something happen."

"You're right…thank you. So maybe we can meet up here in 15 minutes later?"

"Sure. Then see you there, Lacus-san." With that said Murrue stop the intercom.

Lacus was alone in her room again…thinking. She just kept thinking back about the times she had spent with Kira. It was so peaceful…and happy. She had never asked for something else…but now this happened?

No…rather than blaming and just crying why. She had to act to achieve what she wanted. This will be the first time that she had so strong will after her father's death. Lacus prepared a small bag that she wanted to bring with.

A knocking sound was heard before someone spoke up. "Miss Lacus, can we go in?"

"Yes, please come in, Flaga-san." Mu came in with his pilot suit.

"Would it be okay if we're going for just the two of us? Don't worry, I won't let any harm befall you."

"Yes, that would be fine. Did you tell anyone else?" Lacus asked.

"Well…yes, just the Orb's princess and the Zala boy."

"Did they say anything?"

"They said that they're going to stay here, chances are that Zaft won't attack us again soon so that left only the Earth Alliance. And they also said…that if it's Kira. He wouldn't do anything…rash…"

"I hope so…then shall we be on our way?" Mu nodded and left the room first, Lacus looked back and grabbed her bag before leaving after Mu.

* * *

"So…what happened? Captain Ramius, I felt like it was a little intense back there. I mean Lacus's voice." Waldfeld asked Murrue since she came to Eternal with Mu. They were talking in Waldfeld office since they knew that something shouldn't talk in public.

"Kira-kun sent a message to Lacus-san."

"Really! What did he say?" Waldfeld was surprised, Kira just left Eternal not long ago and now he sent the message back to Lacus?

"He said he wanted to meet her." Murrue replied before Waldfeld began to brew the coffee.

"And she wants to go right?" Waldfeld asked.

"Yeah…maybe right now, she is leaving…I'm sorry that I didn't tell you earlier."

"Hey, hey, are you joking me? She's going there alone?"

"No, Mu will go with her."

"Even so…I would say that it's not safe around…Kira. I'm sorry to say it. But I don't want to be optimistic…he isn't himself lately…I wonder what happened to him before he came here." Waldfeld handed over the coffee to Murrue before they continued the conversation.

"Did you…see something on his collar? I mean it's not that noticeable but I think it's different from the one he wore before." Murrue sipped the coffee that Waldfeld just gave her.

"Sorry…I didn't see it. He just got back here and just in a blink of an eye, he's gone…"

"Yeah…I understand…" They drank the coffee again before they continued. "Still…I'm feeling pretty bad for them – Lacus-san and Kira-kun. They're just still in their teens. And now all this happen to them."

"Do you think they will ever be able to live a peaceful, normal life?" Waldfeld said with a saddened face

"I don't know…but I sure hope they will."

* * *

"Thank you, Flaga-san." Lacus said as she took the man hand down from the Strike's cockpit.

"We should be careful, I've never been here. Not even once." Mu said before he took out his gun and unlocked the safety. Every lights were turned on, giving them anxiety that someone must

They walked inside the center building that served as the lab back when it was still in use. Everything was in a total mess. Something must happened back then but there was just a few records about what happened here. They reached what looked to be like the center of the building. It had a cylinder shape, and they saw many floors above them.

"Someone's here…" Mu said then raised his gun. A bullet hit wall, separating Mu and Lacus. Then someone continued to fire a gun towards Lacus, forcing her into another room. "Are you all right, Lacus-Ojou chan!"

"Yes, I am!"

"Wait, right there! I'll go an-"

"You're not going anywhere, Mu La Flaga." A cold man voice that filled with cunning was heard before a shadow figure was seen on the higher floor.

"Cruset?" Mu pointed his gun towards the shadow figure.

"You and that Lacus-Ojou chan, have a different role here." Cruset shown himself and fired his gun at Mu.

"Flaga-" A hand covered Lacus's lip before pulling her further into the room.

"Ojou-chan!"

"Don't worry, no harm will come to her, provide that she cooperates with him."

"Him…you don't mean…"

* * *

"Lacus…" Lacus heard a kind voice then she quickly turned her face, wanting to see the voice's owner face. "Kira…I was so worry…"

Kira turned Lacus around in his arms and kissed her cheek. "I'm sorry…for what happened earlier…did it hurt?" Lacus shook her head.

"You…are alright now right?" Lacus cuddled her face into Kira's chest.

"Yeah…I am…" Kira's voice was gentle; it had changed when he was unstable.

"Then let's go back…everyone is waiting."

"No, it's the other way around Lacus. I called you out here not to go back but to take you back with me." Lacus quickly pushed herself away from Kira when she heard those words.

"What…what are you saying?"

"I want to protect you…so it would be safer if you stay with me."

"That's not what I meant! Why won't you…"

"Returning to meet everyone? If I meet them now I'll have to kill them you know?" Kira grinned. Lacus had always liked when Kira grinned because it usually shows that Kira is happy. "I don't want to kill them…I'll leave them to Cruset-san's judgment."

"What's that supposed to mean? Leave them to Major Cruset's judgment. You're not going to protect them?"

"That's easy. Cruset-san will judge whether they're suitable to keep alive or not. They're the only one that get exception. Don't you think it's great? Everyone else doesn't deserve to be judged."

"What has those people done to you, Kira! Didn't you say you hate war and like people!"

"Did you know what they had done…? If Human hadn't mess with the genetic engineering in the first place…then this war, this chain of sadness wouldn't happen."

"You don't have the right to judge people!"

"I have…because…I'm not that of normal human! I'm a monster born from artificial womb! Now…do you see what I mean? My father…Dr. Ulen Hibiki modify my genetic…to be the ultimate coordinator." Kira was filled with rage as he told Lacus his story.

"He wanted me to stand on top of everyone else and so I shall. I will stand on top of everyone else and cleanse this world of this corrupted, wicked people!"

Lacus slapped Kira's left side with her hand. "Snap out of it Kira! You father wouldn't want you to do that. He just wanted you to be happy when you can do anything you want!"

"And did I ask for that? I never ask for that! Did you know? If my mother, didn't send me away…I would have been used as a weapon for either the coordinator, for Patrick Zala, or the Blue Cosmos by now. Everyone was searching for me high and low, wanting to use me. Not as a coordinator but as a weapon."

"So that's why you want to kill them."

"What do you they think that if everyone learns of my existence? They will all want to be like me…to be better than other people and to be able to look down on others." Kira said, his eyes filled with anger.

"Everyone isn't like that! You can't just – "

"They are like that, Lacus! If they weren't, then this war wouldn't start in the first place. I'll kill every last one of them like how they killed my parents!" Kira finally shouted out his resolved, his determination.

Lacus took the gun out of her bag and pointed at Kira. "I won't let you do that. I won't let you kill people…I will stop you…even if that's mean I have to stop you by force."

"Do you have what it takes to pull the trigger?" Kira grabbed the gun and pointed at his heart. "Then fire the gun, Lacus!"

Lacus hands were shaking, her fingers trembling at the trigger. Soon tears were rolling down on her cheeks. "Kira…" Lacus fell to her knee. "Please…go back to what you used to be…"

"This is the path I have chosen…you too…have chosen a path. Goodbye…Lacus…I hope that you stay alive until the war end…if you guys don't interfere then the chance that you will survive is very high…" Kira turned his back on Lacus and walked away in the shadow of that room…leaving Lacus alone. "Cruset-san, I already finish my business…we meet outside."

* * *

"Hahaha…no one can stop this now…this world of endless desire…I will open the final door that leads Humanity to its end!" Cruset threw a smoke grenade before he disappeared under the gray smoke.

"Shit!" Mu coughed from the smoke. "Lacus Ojou-chan!" Mu ran over to the room that Lacus vanished into. Mu ran into found Lacus crying on the floor with the gun on the floor, besides her. "Is…everything alright?"

"Kira…Kira, he…completely changed…" Lacus said.

"Come…let's get you back to the ship and rest…it looks like you've been through a lot with him." Lacus nodded and before she looked up she realized something was in her bag. It was a disc and a picture. The same one that Cagali had it. "Can you walk?" Lacus nodded. She had never felt this sad and bitter.

* * *

"Are you okay, Lacus?" Cagali had waited for Lacus to return on Eternal.

"I'm all right…can you please let me be alone for a while…" Lacus returned to her room alone.

"What happened on Mendel?" Cagali asked Mu.

"I don't know…she kept quiet for the rest of the returning trip…She will cheer up soon…I guess."

* * *

Lacus switched on the light and sat on the bed. She didn't want to be alone but she couldn't bring herself to smile either. She would be making everyone sad…

"Lacus…can I come in?" Cagali asked over the intercom.

"Yes…" Cagali sat besides Lacus, hoping to help Lacus relieved her sadness and stress.

"Hey…you can told me what happened back there…it's okay to share with other people…if you carry the burden alone. Someday you will break down." Cagali said.

"It's just…it's just that I feel like somehow, it's my fault so I want to deal things alone." Lacus leaned her head to Cagali's shoulder.

"Did Kira…say something to you?" Lacus shook her head.

"Kira…Kira has completely changed…he is engulfed in bitter hatred and I don't know how to comfort him…back there, his were totally filled with determination too. He said that he's going to kill everyone."

"What drove Kira to go this far, I wonder?"

"Many things…I heard many things from him…what his reasons are. I don't know where to start…especially for you."

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't ask you about this topic. Get some rest first, Lacus. We can talk afterward."

"Um…Cagali-san…here, please take this." Lacus handed over Cagali the picture and the disc. "I don't know what's in the disc either but I think Kira wanted me to know something that's why he gave this to me so if you could please…"

"Yeah, just leave everything to me Lacus." Cagali left Lacus to have some rest, Athrun was waiting for her outside.

"How is Lacus?"

"Not good, let's talk thing over at Kusanagi. I want Lacus to rest her mind to ease. It seems like she's been through a lot." Athrun nodded as a replied.

* * *

"So he's a clone of your father?" Murrue asked Mu. They were talking in the Archangel's quarter.

"Yeah…I didn't want to believe it but…the face under that mask. It's totally the same. And on top of that…he said he was a failed product…" Mu said clasping his fist. "He cursed this world…I kind of understand his reasons. He has no past…no future…perhaps not even an identity…"

"That's so sad…" Mu nodded at Murrue's words. "Then why is Kira-kun cooperates with him?"

"I don't know…the only thing I know right now is that he is dangerous…" Murrue let out a heavy breath. To Murrue, she was the one who pulled Kira into the world of war, pulled an innocent boy into a cycle of war, cycle of hatred.

* * *

"_Stop it! That's not just a thing! It's a life!" A woman grabbed the shoulder of a man in a gown suit, tears rolling down her eyes _

"_Because it's a life! I will complete it! So he will have a wonderful life awaiting him!" The man replied _

"_How could this child have a wonderful life! Life isn't supposed to be manufacture, it's should be born naturally!"_

"_Because he can do everything! He will be the Ultimate Coordinator, standing on top of everyone else! How isn't that wonderful!" _

"_Is it really for his sake? Not for your sake?" _

"_It's for his sake!"_

"_Liar! Give him back, give my other child back to me!"_

"_His life is mine, half of my blood flows through his veins! And I will use the ultimate technology man had ever have to make him the Ultimate Coordinator!" The man looked into the woman eyes before he said. "Please, Via! We are already at the point of no return."_

"_I don't understand…I don't want to understand, Ulen!" Via ran away from the scene, leaving Ulen behind, alone._

"So…that's why Kira gave this disc to Lacus…" Cagali said.

"But this doesn't clarify anything such as why Kira is going crazy like that…" Athrun said.

"Wait…there's more…"

"_I'm sorry…Via…that we have to send Kira and Cagali away._" Ulen said before hugging her.

"_It's okay…I understand…for the sake of the kids…_" Via said while smiling.

"_I never thought that…both the Blue Cosmos and the Zaft Council would going after us…after Kira…_"

The files ended after that.

"What…what does it mean?" Cagali was confused, she didn't understand.

"I know…just like what my father did. They're searching for Kira because they think of Kira as a valuable weapon. Whether as a warrior or a weapon developer. Kira would be a great asset to whatever field he's going to work." Athrun said, his eyes felt with resentment

"But…Kira got angry because someone just wanted to use him?" Cagali said, saddened by the events that happened.

"Maybe Kira knows something we don't. Now that you mention it, what happened to Mr. Ulen and Mrs. Via?" Athrun said

"I don't know…but maybe Captain Ramius or Captain Waldfeld can find us a clue in the military database."

"Can you go alone? I'm worry about Lacus…maybe I'll let her on about what the disc contains." Cagali nodded.

"Okay…then take this picture with you too. Lacus also gave it to me earlier. Maybe it can hold her together until she meets Kira again." Athrun took the frame from Cagali's hand before kissing her on the cheek and walking away."

* * *

"Are you all right, Cruset-san? I saw you in a pain back there." Kira asked, standing in front of Cruset desk"

"Yeah…I never thought that Mu was that good. But don't worry, everything is going as planned. What about you? I thought that you want to bring Lacus-Ojou sama back here." Cruset asked, taking the pills and water into his mouth afterward.

"We chose different path…different beliefs. So this is the path we've chosen. None of us will back down either."

"Ho…so I hope that when the time comes, you'll be able to cut down the ties you have…"

"Don't worry about me, I know what to do."

"By the way, I've already proceed to the next step of the plans while we went to Mendel. I gave Neutron Jammer Canceller to the Earth Alliance force along with a girl. They should have received it by now."

"Things are starting to get interesting...so what's our next step?"

"We will attack Eternal as the Chairman Zala order us to destroy it."

"Umm…Cruset-san…I know it's late to ask but why did you want to go with me to talk with Mu-san?"

"I told you before right? I'm a clone of Al Da Flaga. His personality is quite…arrogant and yet he cares for his son. So I guess it was just this feeling that I can't get rid of."

"That's clear thing up…then I'll be checking Freedom's system." Kira left the room, leaving Cruset behind to rest. "Oh, and by the way. I'll be acting on my own in the battlefield." Kira went back to tell Cruset before he left for sure this time.

Cruset grinned and thought. "Hmm…I've to be careful…I don't know what he is thinking…"

* * *

"_I-I'm a coordinator too." The brown haired boy said stammer._

"_Is that so? But the reason you are kind is because you are you, right?" Lacus smiled. "Would you mind telling me your name?" Lacus asked, her eyes filled with joy of meeting someone kind._

"_Ah, Ki-Kira desu…Kira Yamato!" Kira blushed, the girl surely knew that the boy in front of her was a kind boy the way he acted. It seemed as he was shy, reluctant but would be reliable sometimes._

"_Thank you, Kira-sama!" _

Lacus thought back to how she first met Kira. She began to like him since then, he was kind and shy. That's the more reason that she will changed Kira back to a kind person. The Kira now isn't him, even when she pointed her gun at him. He didn't show a bit of flinching or surprising but he just dared her to fire it.

"Lacus…" Waldfeld spoke over the intercom. "We're going to battle with the Dominion."

Lacus looked saddened and let out a heavy breath.

"Lacus…I know that you're not in the condition." Waldfeld said Lacus. "You don't have to come to the bridge…just rest assured."

"No…I'll be there in a few minutes." Lacus closed the intercom and prepared to leave for the bridge.

Lacus quickly her pace to the bridge, she wanted to know everything that's going around her life right now. She had to keep cool mind and think of something. Something to ensure that the war will end and Kira will come back to her.

Lacus rode the elevator to the bridge and quickly sat on her chair. "What about Zaft? Captain Waldfeld."

"They haven't made any movement, but we already take some pre-caution, don't worry." Waldfeld said before going back to command the Eternal.

"Commander! The Nazca ships…they're moving!" The red haired looked like in his late teen said.

"Speak of the devil…inform Captain Ramius and Kusanagi that we will go to deal with them." Waldfeld said.

The officer at CIC informed the Archangel and Kusanagi.

"We will go too. Archangel should be able to hold its own with the Dominion. Tell Lieutenant Flaga to stay with the Archangel." Kisaka said

Everyone nodded before something surprised them even more.

"Captain, it's the Freedom." Everyone bit their lips, when Kira was on their side, he was reliable. But when he turned into an enemy. He is a foe to be accounted with.

The fight soon began, with the Eternal and Kusanagi started the battle with Zaft. The Archangel and Dominion soon exchanged fires with the same type of weapon. It's up to the skill of the gunner to decide the outcome of the battle, and of course with the tactical strategy too.

* * *

"I can't destroy Dominion or anyone yet right?" Kira asked Cruset.

"Yeah, we need them to go back to the moon base safely and start the next factor that will lead to the final step of our plan." Cruset replied.

"Okay then, I'm going." Kira drove the Freedom into the battlefield, immobilizing every mobile suit in his view except the Zaft side. Should he attacked them now, it will create a problem later. Cruset watched as Kira began causing chaos in the battlefield in his Mobile Suit.

* * *

"Captain…the Freedom…it's immobilizing everyone…" Sai said.

"What's Kira-kun…thinking…" Murrue said as she watched the Freedom fired its weapons everywhere.

"Well at least…the kid still got his good side?" Mu asked.

"Maybe…but if he's going to act like that then we can leave him be. Now we have to focus our battle with the Dominion."

"Yes, sir!" Everyone said.

* * *

"Kira…" Lacus mumbling alone as she watched the Freedom destroying the M1 Astrays. "Everyone…I'm sorry…I was the one who gave him that sword…" Tears rolled down from Lacus eyes. She should have be able to stop this from happening and yet she let it happen.

* * *

Okay…I feel like I made some part of this chapter down hill. Since I spent my time in another Kira x Lacus too much. I'm sorry. I promise that the next chapter will be better.


End file.
